day 154: trying

I am simply dragging my feet.

Not wanting the chaos of tomorrow to arrive.

Because when it does, it stays for 9 months.

I can shoo it away every now and then, for a break.

But it rapidly creeps back into place.

I do love my job.

I won't negate that for even a moment.

But it brings chaos into our life.

I force myself out of bed.

The next moment I have to take a breath is when I'm finally able to let myself fall back into bed.

I'm "on" more than I like.

The center of attention more often that I'd prefer.

And once we're home, it's baths, and kids' homework, and lunches and clothes for the next day, and bed.

And then my own homework.

And housework.

And trying to still exercise.

And I'm sighing just typing about it.

Like Aaron reminded me, I should be glad.

There are two more milestones until we arrive at that day.

School starting.

Then my birthday.

And school has it's own way of making Mondays fade into Fridays.

So I should be ready, and anxious, and excited.

But I'm still just dragging my feet.