day 189: offspring

Oh, good heavens.

My offspring truly have me baffled.

Surely I was not so odd during my childhood. In fact, my mother has been known to proclaim that I was perfect. (but I'm sure that's another blog entry for another day. back to my littles...)

Sometimes, when I share things my kids say or do, I'm certain people think I sit at home and make this up.

Scouts' honor, this stuff is as true as it gets.

Story #1: This morning, one of the girls started singing this song. Which resulted in the second girl singing it. And you can guess what that led to. Over and over and over. It's only been a week since the last time we watched Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, but it was, apparently, the tune of the day. I made the mistake of telling the girls how annoying it was getting. And you know what happened next. More singing. And louder. And then they added their own words. Like bacon lollipops. It traveled all the way from home to school. Which meant while I was in devotions, a large picture appeared on half of my dry erase board.

Their own depiction of the song. Complete with people holding lollipops and a monkey named Steve (and my oddest little, crouching and making her normal "crazy picture" face). They didn't want me to go all day, without them, not having a reminder of that annoying song. God love 'em.

Story #2: On the way to school this morning, Vanessa Carlton's 1000 Miles played off the iPod, and a while back, I wrote about it's importance to me here. As no surprise, that song's nothing new to my girls. They heard the opening notes, and they promptly asked me to turn it up. I obliged. Halfway through the song, on the second or third time the chorus was repeating, McK questioned, "Why doesn't she just drive? She doesn't have to walk!" (which will make no sense if you don't listen to the song or read the lyrics.....so do) Oh, good heavens, I laughed till tears promised to spill over onto my cheeks.

Story #3: Still today. This morning. I told you I'm not making this stuff up. Couldn't if I tried. Every morning, I read off the list of what special classes the girls have.....who has art, music, library, PE, etc. Library days require that the right girl takes her library books with her to school. PE days require that the right girl wears PE appropriate tennis shoes. And keeping track of all that is tiring. But we had the discussion this morning. Which included this:

Reagan: Mom, I had PE yesterday.

Me: I know. What's your point?
Reagan: Well, guess what Mr. L made us do?
Me: What?

Reagan: He made us do 20 crunches. Do you know how painful those things are?

Me (laughing): Actually, yes, I do!

Story #4: And again, today. Before we arrived at school, after I had laughed at the driving comment and found some space between the stupid sunshine and lollipops, there was a necessitated Come to Jesus meeting with McK. You see, this little kindergartner has managed to earn herself one red dot a week....so far. Nothing major, just things she knows better than to do. Yesterday, surprisingly, she came home with a green dot, but I could tell by her face that she had something to confess. I was right. She completely missed going to computer class.....because she refused to wake up after nap time. Slept right through it. Her teacher woke her up.....but McK laid right back down and crashed. Can't blame her, really, cause school wears me out, too. But this morning, we had to chat about it. Told her that from here on out, when the lights came on and the teacher woke her up, she needed to stand up, move around, get a drink of water, and no more sleeping. Or else. "So, McKinley, tell me. When your teacher wakes you up today, what are you going to do?"

"Get up. And then throw something at my teacher."

And then there was a roar of laughter in the car.....but not from the mom.

Like I have said before, I do not know where that child is from. From her father, yes. But not me. I was the perfect child, after all.