day 208: almost

It's rather tremendous to try and explain this.

And it makes me feel a smidge better to know that even though I can't quite put to words how this feels for you to comprehend, you'll never fully understand me unless you've been there before.

There is a weight, a pressure, actually, that is slowly lifted off my shoulders, my head, and my heart, with each hour that passes, each phone call that's made, each text that's sent.

It makes me breathe a little easier, step a little lighter, see a little clearer, think a little free-er.

*************

I keep thinking in lasts.

Tonight was the last grocery getting trip I have to make with my entourage in tow.

This morning was the last I have to spend in church without being able to hold his hand.

This weekend's laundry was the last to not have men's clothing washed, dried, folded, put away.

This is the last Colts game I'll have to watch by myself.

This is the last Sunday that no one will beat me to the Sunday newspaper ads.

(and I'm good with all of that)