only 5 more days of 5 of us
To me, it doesn't get more bittersweet than this.
In a few ways, actually.
Summer feels like she just barely got here and unpacked her luggage. We're just now used to her laid-back routine, her piping-hot days, and her really late bedtimes. And since the days of going back to school after Labor Day are now a prehistoric idea, the girls will step into their classrooms in a matter of days. I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't miss my kiddos being at home with me. I love being home with them, making mac & cheese at lunch for way too many times in a one-week span, playing with Pla-Doh, telling them to clean up their Barbies. It is slightly easier knowing that they're excited to go back, but then I wonder when I became old enough to have a 5th grader....
A 5th grader who just turned 10 this week. In the blink of an eye, how did that happen? I remember that July day with clarity. I showed up for my scheduled appointment, on my baby's due date, clearly uncomfortable but clueless that I was actually in labor. "Did you have any idea you were already 4 centimeters dilated?" the doctor asked. Umm, no. Did you know I've never done this before? Aaron quickly got to the hospital after my frantic phone call, and in the meantime, oh was it starting to get more painful. I spoke up, telling them I did intend on having an epidural (I had nothing to prove anyways). They told me to take it easy.....cause I would be there for a while. Here, have a dose of Nubain; it'll take the edge off. Something told me that this wasn't the case, that I wouldn't be there for a while, and that I really needed that epidural now. I tried to distract myself and tried to not yell at Aaron too much. I called my mom, 3 hours away, and asked her to come down because it was time. She, too, was unbelieving. Told me to keep her posted on my progress, and she'd head here when it was closer. I hung up and cried. Did no one understand this laboring woman's pain? Again, I spoke up, telling the nurses that I truly was in a lot of pain. So they investigated.....and the doctor came running in, and I pushed 3 or 4 times, and Kennedy was born, promptly on her due date. Four hours of labor, naturally. I called Mom again....told her she missed it :) And to this day, I won't let her live that down.
Which leads me to the most bittersweet part of this story: since a July day almost six years ago, we've been a family of five. Now, we've got five days left (or maybe less) of being a family of five. I don't know if my thoughts in the days before giving birth are normal, but I always go through that bit of semi-panic, wondering how this new little baby is going to change my family. Not in a negative way, but purely curious at how it will all play out. How this newest and last family member is going to change our dynamics. I have five more days of being a mom of three. I'm trying to remind myself of that each day now, as a reminder to stop what I'm doing and play a board game when asked, to snuggle on the couch and watch yet one more episode of Phineas and Ferb, to keep my patience instead of say things with a short temper. Five more days.....part of me wants to do something celebratory on Monday night, a sort of last hurrah for our party of five. But, knowing us, we'll hang out in the living room, just together--cause that's enough for us.
In a few ways, actually.
Summer feels like she just barely got here and unpacked her luggage. We're just now used to her laid-back routine, her piping-hot days, and her really late bedtimes. And since the days of going back to school after Labor Day are now a prehistoric idea, the girls will step into their classrooms in a matter of days. I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't miss my kiddos being at home with me. I love being home with them, making mac & cheese at lunch for way too many times in a one-week span, playing with Pla-Doh, telling them to clean up their Barbies. It is slightly easier knowing that they're excited to go back, but then I wonder when I became old enough to have a 5th grader....
A 5th grader who just turned 10 this week. In the blink of an eye, how did that happen? I remember that July day with clarity. I showed up for my scheduled appointment, on my baby's due date, clearly uncomfortable but clueless that I was actually in labor. "Did you have any idea you were already 4 centimeters dilated?" the doctor asked. Umm, no. Did you know I've never done this before? Aaron quickly got to the hospital after my frantic phone call, and in the meantime, oh was it starting to get more painful. I spoke up, telling them I did intend on having an epidural (I had nothing to prove anyways). They told me to take it easy.....cause I would be there for a while. Here, have a dose of Nubain; it'll take the edge off. Something told me that this wasn't the case, that I wouldn't be there for a while, and that I really needed that epidural now. I tried to distract myself and tried to not yell at Aaron too much. I called my mom, 3 hours away, and asked her to come down because it was time. She, too, was unbelieving. Told me to keep her posted on my progress, and she'd head here when it was closer. I hung up and cried. Did no one understand this laboring woman's pain? Again, I spoke up, telling the nurses that I truly was in a lot of pain. So they investigated.....and the doctor came running in, and I pushed 3 or 4 times, and Kennedy was born, promptly on her due date. Four hours of labor, naturally. I called Mom again....told her she missed it :) And to this day, I won't let her live that down.
Which leads me to the most bittersweet part of this story: since a July day almost six years ago, we've been a family of five. Now, we've got five days left (or maybe less) of being a family of five. I don't know if my thoughts in the days before giving birth are normal, but I always go through that bit of semi-panic, wondering how this new little baby is going to change my family. Not in a negative way, but purely curious at how it will all play out. How this newest and last family member is going to change our dynamics. I have five more days of being a mom of three. I'm trying to remind myself of that each day now, as a reminder to stop what I'm doing and play a board game when asked, to snuggle on the couch and watch yet one more episode of Phineas and Ferb, to keep my patience instead of say things with a short temper. Five more days.....part of me wants to do something celebratory on Monday night, a sort of last hurrah for our party of five. But, knowing us, we'll hang out in the living room, just together--cause that's enough for us.
But isn't that party in the living room enough? You are a fabulous family of five and will be a super family of six! But alas, they do grow up too quickly and all too soon we wonder, just like you are with your oldest, where the time has gone!
ReplyDeletePraise God that you are welcoming another beautiful baby into your wonderful family! Hope to meet this one before she is in school!
Love and Hugs!