a proclamation

I've never really thought my story mattered.

Rewind to 2003, February to be exact. I was left standing in the frigid, winter cold on the steps of the Heslar Naval Armory.

Two chartered buses pulled away, and I was left holding a car seat with a 7-month old baby bundled up inside. March (and the invasion), April, May.....and on through June were all a blur. I was naive, and I simply did what I had to do--for my daughter, my college classes, my job, and my husband who would email me about once every week or so, my husband who was fighting a war that I still don't understand.

He was welcomed home as a hero, but he was not the same husband that I waved goodbye to on those steps in February. The weeks that passed were rough, but eventually his story came out. I frantically followed along, taking notes on paper and in my mind. You see, I had quite the undertaking in mind....a scrapbook. No, more of a masterpiece, really. It told his story, every letter home, every email, every snapshot taken of a sandstorm or an oil well on fire. What had happened with my story, it didn't really matter at the time.

Five years, two kids, and one house later, deployment #2. Same country, totally different scenario. I know now that I did what I could. But I definitely did not play the single mom role as well as I had hoped. I failed at something every day. My kids loved me, but I was falling apart. Instead of reveling in his story, I was too caught up in my life. Lightbulb moment: my story mattered. My own struggles (my personal war) were/was different than his, making my side of the story just as important. Just as worth telling.

2010, deployment #3. New country, old fears, new perspective. I hereby declare my story as a work in progress.

Deservingly and understandably, people are in awe of a Marine's life and experiences. Too many people, though, fail to see that the families left behind are just as brave and just as strong. We, too, have stories to tell.

So let me cherish this somewhat selfish moment, because I am going to tell my story...